Do I break things off?

I’ve been in a long term relationship for a year and a half - we had planned on getting married and having kids.

4 months ago he cheated on me and lied to me for 3 months saying he didn’t until I finally got it out of him. He lied to me for MONTHS saying he wants a family.. to tell me he wants to wait.

To me he is emotionally abusive. We use to have a great healthy loving relationship. He made me feel happy, pretty, and not care about my weight. Things have been really falling - he makes me feel useless and not loved and used.

I ask myself if I’m dumb to stay with him. Most of the time the answer is yes. But that small part of me wants to believe he’ll change to the person he once was. I love him a lot- well I fell in love with the person who I first met. Now I feel like I’m living with a roommate who I occasionally have sex with and hang out with. It’s sad but I know he’d much rather be out with friends and partying and smoking than with me. (I’m 18, he’s 21) I feel like we are on a whole different chapter. I want to settle down. To find that person who WANTS to have a family with me and who won’t forget we are in a committed relationship. At this point I’m at a loss. (I’ve kicked him out 2 times but he’s back now)