Is this normal ?

I deal with a lot of depression. I’m abused verbally, sexually, and physically by my husband. That makes it worse. I don’t feel comfortable opening up and talking to anyone. I finally opened up and talked to someone and I feel like worse after I do. Like I am just trying to get attention, like I’m being stupid and needy. Is something wrong with me? I thought I was supposed to feel better and not guilty for sharing my problems. I have things daily that happen that I wish I could talk about but feel like it would just weigh our friendship down even though they told me they wanted me to talk to them I just don’t think I can.