feelings

It’s crazy how the absence of certain people can affect the mental well-being and emotions of a person to an extent where they don’t know what to do with themselves now.

I lost my grandmother and grandfather within a week, I have never had to go through a significant loss like this, I’m 16 btw. The feeling that has stayed with me since they left is just lingering inside me. I know everyone has to go through grief and pain like this but I just don’t know how. How do people brush it off like nothing happened, I know they’re in a better place, yes, but it’s like my body won’t let me accept that.

My family is very close, we would always come together at big events like Christmas, birthdays and Easter’s etc, I guess it’s all going to change now. I think my problem is that I can’t cope with the fact that something is going to change and I can’t fix it. I’m going to have to live the rest of my life with memories of the good times, it’s just so different.

I can feel that my moods and lifestyle has changed because everyone is going through pain, I don’t feel the same anymore, I miss them badly and the heartache will be here forever. I could go on forever telling you how great they were, but I’ll probably make a mistake somewhere.

I’m sorry, but I felt like I needed to type all this out, it’s horrible, please, to anyone reading this, spend as much time as you can with the people you love, talk to people you haven’t spoken to for a while and tell them you love them, because you never know when it will be the last time. I learnt that a few months ago, my perspective on life has changed.

I hope god takes good care of my grandmother and grandfather up in heaven. No more pain now, rest easy my loves ❤️😔