Should fiancés brother propose to his girlfriend during our engagement?

Question

So my fiancé’s brother is proposing to his girlfriend tomorrow, and yes I am happy for them. But I feel like my thunder has been stolen because we got engaged about 9 months ago and are planning the wedding. Here’s the kicker, his family planned a vacation to the beach for the proposal and even invited close family friends, but not us. Also we were planning our wedding in the fall and that’s when they have been planning their wedding. (Yes, they were not even engaged but planning out their wedding) like I said, I’m happy for them but I feel that my wedding is going to be a second thought now. Especially since my fiancé’s brother is his half brother and my fiancé’s step mom (been around since he was 2) tends to favor his brother. Any advice as to how I could feel better about the situation, if we should push our wedding to be sooner, or let them have their glory and we can have our moment after?

Answer

It would be really selfish to have everyone else put thier relationship on hold for your entire engagement. I think as long as they didnt do it at your wedding (without asking) then it's fine. Planning their wedding for the same time as yours is pretty shitty though. Especially if you aren't on board with it.

Answer

I don’t think someone else should have to wait to propose or marry just because someone close to them got engaged recently. Engagements shouldn’t be about “thunder” or who is paying more attention, it should be about the love between you and your soon to be spouse. No one else matters. Just worry about your wedding and they will worry about theirs. Sounds like happy news to me

Answer

My husband and I were engaged for two years before getting married. We had two sets of friends get engaged during that time and it did not diminish our relationship. Focus on you and your future hubby, and as long as they don't plan their wedding for the same weekend as yours, don't worry about it.

Answer

I dont think they should have to wait until your married, but still should be respectful. A few weeks or months is fine. My cousin got engaged 2 days after me, but because her now husband makes more money my family has only paid attention to her wedding. Meanwhile when I ask for wedding advice they ignore me. So none of them are invited 🤷‍♀️🖕 instead it's a friends & immediate family only event

Answer

I think proposing is fine, I think because they are engaged after they could give you guys a 2 month grace period around the actual weddings so everyone can feel loved and celebrated individually and not overshadowed. Weddings are giant changes to the family structure. So there is thunder, and hustle, and bustle!

Answer

My youngest sister got engaged August of 2018. My now fiancé proposed Christmas of 2018. There were no hurt feelings. I did ask my sister if she was planning her wedding at all before deciding on my wedding date. She hasn’t started and is in no rush to start so I get to nuts. We’re both happy for one another and that’s how you should feel. 9 months is quite a long time to STILL be expecting some sort of special treatment....

Answer

I know how you feel. It all started before we got engaged when we started ttc.... Them his oldest brother(28) found out his girlfriend was pregnant(april/may)..... Then his younger brother (18, 17 at the time) found out his girlfriend was pregnant(june). In August I sent over to my now fiances moms to take her birthday card and we we're talking and his younger brother was there and she asked when we we're gonna get married and have kids and then his brother chimed in and said he was thinking about proposing to his girlfriend and mom got a little upset. But then September came and we got engaged and then in October his older brother proposed and November his younger brother proposed. They both did it without rings so I kind of feel like it was because we were already engaged and they wanted to keep the spotlight. But his older brother gave her one of their grandmothers rings and his younger brother got her a ring for Christmas. I totally feel like they stole the spotlight from us.

Should fiancés brother propose to his girlfriend during our engagement?

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