Losing my SO

So this is a really sore subject but I’m just wondering if there’s anybody with advice or with a similar situation just to talk to because at this point I’m kind of just confused.

On Sunday March 3rd, my boyfriend of 8 months and I went to stay the night at his moms house (I have met his family maybe 3-4 times) but he was leaving to Cancun at 4am the next morning Monday March 4th and I was planning to stay with his mom and sisters for the week until he got back so that I could get to know them better. He made it to Cancun and we FaceTimed and texted pretty much all day long until his phone died at around 8pm here & 11pm in Cancun. I texted his friend to make sure everything was okay and he said yes so I went to sleep and was going to talk to him in the morning.

I wake up to a painful screaming and crying from his moms room so I run in and try to get her to calm down and talk so I could help for about 30 minutes and then she finally says “cris died”. I didn’t even know how to react. How do you all i could do was say no and pray profusely that it wasn’t true. But it was true. He had been drinking and the law enforcement from mexico say that he fell off of a balcony and died of brain trauma instantly.

I don’t even know how to handle this. I’m eighteen years old and he was as well. He was turning 19 in about 2 weeks. I have a 1 and a half year old baby that isn’t his daughter but loved her like she was and my whole life seems impossibly and turned upside down and everything seems hopeless. People say everything happens for a reason but that doesn’t change the fact that he was taken so harshly and so soon.