Can’t win

I need advice.

I am engaged to be married and I don’t know if I can do it. We have kids together and it’s hard to focus on just us sometimes. I feel like we’ve fallen out of love. My fiancé used to do all of these special things for me and he doesn’t anymore. He doesn’t even listen to me about things that are bothering me. I am so tired of trying to explain myself.

These are just a few examples of what I’m talking about:

Example A)

Him- “They want me to work tomorrow, should I say yes or no?”

Me- “Say whatever you want, you can make your own decisions.”

Him - “It’s not about what I want, what do you want?”

Me - “I’d rather you stay home so we can spend some time with you since you worked night and day all week”

Him 2 hours later: “I told them I will work because it’s just half a day but who really knows”

The next day he leaves at 4:30am and doesn’t get home until 2pm

Him - “What do you wanna do tonight?”

Me - “I wanna bring the kids to the zoo”

Him - “Not that.”

Me - “Why do you ask me what I want if you’re just going to do whatever you want anyways?”

Him - “Why are you always so mean to me?”

Me - “How am I being mean?”

Him - “I am such a horrible fiancé, I can never do anything right.”

Me - 🙄

Example B)

Me - “I really miss when you used to make breakfast every Sunday morning and let me sleep in while you spent time with the kids. How come you stopped doing that?”

Him - “because you never appreciate anything.”

Me - “What? Why are you saying that?”

Him - “because.”

Me - “can you give me an example?”

Him - *stares at me*

Me - “I appreciated it, because if I didn’t I wouldn’t be saying I miss it.”

That weekend I’m in the shower and I smell bacon cooking, I get all excited and this man literally made himself and our kids breakfast and left me one piece of bacon.

Example C)

Him - “You’re so mean to me all the time.”

Me - “How am I mean to you?”

Him - “you’re always telling me how shitty I am”

Me - “No I’m not. Give me an example.”

Him - “You got mad at me for going into work and not saving you enough bacon”

Me - “That’s not why I was mad. I am mad because you don’t listen to me”

Him - “I can never do anything right.”

Me - “Are you serious? I am trying to tell you that I’m not happy and I’m upset and you just ignore me and continue on like it’s not a problem. Like my feelings don’t matter. Maybe next time I just won’t say anything at all. I’ll just stop saying anything until I snap”

Him - Practically already asleep in bed.

Me - Gets up and sleeps on the couch.

Him - Closes bedroom door and doesn’t even try to talk about it anymore, goes back to sleep peacefully.

Me - 2.5 seconds away from packing all of my shit and leaving.

What do I do? I can’t keep living like this. I want to take my kids and just run. I love this man but I feel like this will never change. He obviously feels like I put him down, and nothing I say or do will make him feel differently. He won’t talk to me about it and when I ask him to give me examples he reverses it on me and brings up issues I’ve had in our relationship that haven’t changed. Mind you, I practically praise the ground this man walks on. I am constantly telling him how great of a dad he is, how attractive I find him, how he’s a good worker, how I love and want him. I bend over backwards taking care of him and the kids and I just don’t feel appreciated or cared about at all.