So I've posted about my grandmother before, the way she lives, how she can't handle her money, etc. Well we live with her for multiple reasons. When we moved in, we offered to help with rent, she profusely denied us, saying that our food stamps was well enough. I was recently diagnosed with GD so I've been buying healthy foods, low carbs, lots of veggies, lots of protein. I also have wic. My husband now has two jobs, I really don't feel comfortable being on food stamps at all but it was a requirement for us to move in. She's mad at me for not supplying her with $8 cases of diet coke (the only thing she'll drink,) $4 loaves of bread (she eats bread for breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, etc.. it's a lot of bread,) $6 small tubs of butter (she puts it on her bread.. it adds up.) I cannot eat the way that I need to if I buy her these things. We don't get a lot in food stamps and we live out in the sticks, 30 minutes back and forth from jobs, any source of socialization so a lot goes into gas money as well.

Anyways, it seems she's now mad at us for being able to save enough gas money to not sit around the house all day every day. Let me put her money habits into perspective: my grandpa is a trucker, he brings home anywhere from 500-1500 every weekend. My grandpa also has retirement from the military: 1600 or so. On top of that he has SSI: another 1400 every month. Her SSI is 600 a month. So that alone, SSI and retirement, gives them a total of $3,600. Now add what my papa makes, it's around $6,000, give or take, a month. She has credit card on credit card, she buys frivolous things regularly.. her rent is $1,150 a month. So you'd think she wouldn't end up broke every week.. but she does. And it seems she's mad that the small 2,000, give or take, that my husband brings home every month allows us to live properly. Right now, we're struggling a bit due to buying the things needed for baby but we DO ensure that we have gas money to go places. Yesterday my husband surprised me with two $5.00 plants as I want my own garden some day. She keeps making shitty comments about it. She also degrades my husband and thinks she's being "sassy" and "funny" as older people tend to do in my experience. I'm ready to pack my things and leave, believe me, I am. The only thing that worries me is finding a place and then not being able to afford things like formula, diapers, wipes, etc. I plan on going back to work at 6 weeks pp but my husband will have to cut a job so that we can take alternating shifts as I know we won't be able to afford childcare.

I'm just venting.. I'm tired of cleaning her house while she sits on the sofa 24/7, tired of having to direct her to where the dog is pooping in the house because "he's such a good boy, he didn't do that!" .. well then who did? She takes him out, let's him pee and immediately comes back in and then the dog immediately takes a shit on the floor.. Recently I've only been cleaning where I frequent because I'm just tired.. I'm 7 months pregnant for crying out loud. Hip pains, recently started getting lightning crotch..

Also, another thing really bothering me.. when I moved in, my mom and grandma were at each others throats. My grandma allowed my mother to use her car and my mother totalled it. She was paying my mothers phone bill. My moms a whole different story, when I moved in things bubbled over and exploded and now neither me nor my grandma speak to her. Recently my grandma has been really urging me to rekindle with my mother but I finally came out about the sexual abuse I endured and my mother flat out denies that she did anything wrong. So I said, fuck it, invite her out to lunch, we'll all go and SHE can decide whether she wants to be a part of my life by either coming clean or continue to deny it. Now that my grandmother has a bit of disagreement with me, I know for a fact that they will both rekindle with each other over me trying to live my life as best I can and that may leave me having to go out and find my own place asap, which again, READY for.. but I'd like it to be on my own terms and when I'm 100% positive that I can afford rent and baby.. the good news: either four more months of this or a few weeks lmao.

I know this is all over the place, just a well needed vent..