Unmotivated to lose weight

So ive had up and downs with my weight. I was super chubby as a child, i was told i was super overweight. Right now at 21, im obese with a bmi of 29 or 30. Im 5'3 at 182.2 last i weighed myself. Ive always struggled with my eating. Lately i feel like ive been getting comfortabke with being big. Like none of my jeans i can wear cause my thighs are big and cause chub rub. And i stopped going to the gym seriously in 2017. Ive been going on and off. I just dont have motivation to go since i dont know what to do for me personally to lose weight. I need to lose 80 pounds for me to at my goal weight. I dont know how to eat, cause ive tried low carb high fat i lost weight too slow. Vegan was just a way to cope woth my eating disorder, eating "normal healthy" i didnt feel satisfied. I just have no clue what to do.