does he actually love me?

i’ve been friends with this guys for a couple months, but close to a year of our friendship. we’ve always been there for each other and have the weirdest conversations.

we text a lot and say “i love you” as a joke but i’ve started to like him for who he is and it makes me happy. the problem is, he says it a lot and we’ve gotten more personal in our friendship not FWB but we talk about our feelings and how we’re feeling at the moment, etc.

but for some reason, i feel like he actually loves me but i don’t know, i might just be in over my head. i mean, his ex hates me for no reason and all we ever do it just have stupid teenage conversations. i’m sure he doesn’t feel the same way i do because not to long ago, he kept saying “i love you” and me being me, i wanted to know why.

when i asked him why he loves me, he dodged it and said “i love you” again. i asked him for a reason as to of why he does and he says

“there is no reason, it’s just love”

that’s when i got mad cuz this boy is wasting my time. to me love isn’t just love, it’s more than that. yea you could say “omg i love that dress” or “i love this restaurant” but when it’s with someone it’s personal and more than what you like to eat. i asked him again for a reason and that the words mean a lot more because it’s such a big word to use, he dodges it again and replies with

“pinch my titties and call me sally”

at this point i know i’m probably just being played like in my other relationships, he probably just never even actually cared in the first place. but i mean, it is what it is. i dont know what to think, i just told him i was gonna go to bed and he gave me the sad face, i ignored it and spent a good 30-40 minutes on this app being happy for you girls❤️

but i really don’t know what to do, im in my feelings and it sucks, questions are running through ,my head like does he actually love me, does he want to be more than friends? a lot runs through my head, and that makes things worse because i cant sleep and i haven’t been able to since middle school, i struggle and tried to help myself but he made sleeping so much easier these past few months.

if i’m laying in bed and not tired and just talking on the phone with him, it was easy to fall asleep to cuz he made me feel safe and he has one of those voices if you know what i mean.

but now i cant sleep and i kinda blame myself for this... i just want a honest answer from him, that’s all