Pregnancy triggered my eating disorder

This is my second pregnancy. I was very scared with my first that my eating disorder would come back, but it didn't. I felt beautiful the whole time, amazed by what my body could do. I didn't really have periods due to my struggle, so we didn't even think I could get pregnant. My first was born a small guy and a little early, but very healthy. He's two today. Then I got pregnant again, it was planned this time. My first round went so well, so why wouldn't it go well this time? It started out good, but then I got so many comments on how big I am. "Are you sure you're not having twins?" " I can't believe how long you've got left, you'll be huge", etc. I tried really hard to ignore it. Then one day at around 30 weeks my usual doctor was away when I had a check up and another doctor had the check up. The first thing she said to me was "oh you're so round". My world crashed and I couldn't hold it back anymore. She didn't know my history and I'm sure no one meant anything bad, but it was bad.

I unintentionally ate less, skipped meals etc. I'm not a big woman to begin with. I weighed about 100 lbs pre pregnancy, and I haven't gained much. I'm 37 weeks now and I had gained a total of 10 lbs, but then I lost almost half of it after the doctor thing. I have been having ultrasounds every month during my pregnancy to check on growth because my first was born small. Now those charts have plummeted and the doctors are talking about induction.

I feel like the shittiest mon in the world. Like I shouldn't have kids and don't deserve them. I'm obviously hurting them and it kills me. My partner is so supportive, but at loss at what to do to help me. I've asked for help and will be meeting with specialists on Tuesday. I never realised how bad it was. Sure I knew I might not eat enough, but I really didn't think it was to the point it would affect my baby. I'm just so devastated.