Sex after birth

How long did you wait to have sex after giving birth? I am almost 4 weeks postpartum and I’m still not feeling up to sex at all. To be quite honest I am TERRIFIED for this first sex session. This is my first baby, so I have no idea how sex after baby is going to feel. I ripped pretty bad pretty sure a third/fourth degree tear, but I don’t really know. I am still kinda sore in that area if I do a lot of walking or up an down. I know doctors say wait 6 weeks, but I feel like I’m going to need more time than that.

If you waited longer, how did you approach this conversation with your man? I know he’s dying to have sex. He’s been touching all over me, but I’m not 100% ready for any of that. His birthday is tomorrow and I really want to give him the 🐱 but I know it’s not worth it right now.

Also, how was your first sex experience after birth?