I hate to admit something

With my first pregnancy and birth, I felt so amazing. The HIGH i was in after meeting my first born is indescribable. I still get emotional when I think about it. I was SO in love with him from the moment I met him. During my second pregnancy I didn’t feel really attached to my baby. I thought it was due to being really sick the first 5 months. As my due date approached, I expected to feel the same way I did as with my first born and couldnt wait to meet my second child- my baby girl. However, when she was born, I did not feel the same attachment as I did with my son. To be honest, i was no where near happy as I was the first time around. I thought maybe i would come around in the next few days to weeks. 3 months in, I still am not crazy about my baby girl. Its SO sad to say, and I hate to admit it but I dont think this is normal. Although I am breastfeeding, I just dont feel the bond I am suppose to feel for her being my child. I often catch myself thinking about how I wish she looked like my first born and sometimes i feel like she is not cute at all. Also, I keep obsessing about how I feel like I made a mistake with the name I chose for her— which adds to all these feelings of negativity towards her. I know this sounds horrible and it really is- I hate myself for feeling this way. But I really dont know what to do at this point. I keep hoping one day I will wake up and feel the way “I am supposed to feel” for my baby