Suicidal Thoughts

Hey guys!! Don’t worry about me right now! I just feel alone and that’s what led me to downloading this app again!

Here’s the story...... I’m the type of girl that wished I had control of everything in my life and it bothers me knowing I can’t see my future! I’m in a relationship with a guy I’ve been with for over 2 years. For a while, he was everything that I wanted and needed. But later, I’ve been discovering new things about me when it comes to the type of guys I like and how I want to experience with them. I feel like a piece of shit for second guessing my current relation just because I want to experience someone else. Another thing I’ve noticed is that, although I love my man, I don’t see him supporting the things I want to do in the future. For example, I want to travel, be in the entertainment industry, and these things aren’t something that my man is really into. I love fashion, I love to go shopping and he doesn’t. The bottom line, I have a feeling that the things I’m looking for in my future are what’s gonna break us up!! Is it bad that I want to experience other guys? Although I love my man. Sometimes I wish that I can freeze him, while I go and experiment with people that I believe will benefit me, and then go back to dating him after I’ve got everything out of my system! I know it’s bad to say and it makes me sound evil, but it’s those thoughts that is overwhelming me and making wish I was dead. Cuz then, it’ll be easier, I wouldn’t have to think about anything and I wouldn’t be hurting anyone. I’m the type of girl that gets dangerously overwhelmed when I’m thinking too much and many things at a time!! What do you guys think!! Please share!!