My toxic mom: TRIGGER WARNING *sexual abuse, mental abuse*

When I told my mom I was pregnant for the second time a few months ago, she said she will not co me. She said I am having a baby to save my relationship (which she did in her last relationship ironically) she says that my firstborn..who is 4..will resent the baby. Up until I was 5 months pregnant she kept telling me to get an abortion and tried to coerce me into it. She was also unsupportive with my first as well, saying my life will be over. I told her it bothered me the way she talked to me, and she told me I need therapy..basically calling me crazy. My mom and I have always had a rocky relationship as she is very self centered and immature. She just makes me feel like shit. I am finally happy in a relationship where I am NOT being abused..and she STILL makes me feel bad. She also told me that my life isn't that hard when I was homeless and fighting for custody. When I told her I was raped she said she thought my rapist was a "nice guy." I just don't understand what is wrong with her. I want a relationship with my mom but I don't think she will EVER change. She was very neglectful when I was a baby and even sexually abused me as an infant/toddler, exposing me to sex and pornography. I crave a relationship with my mom, but I feel like she is too toxic.