Porn and Attraction

I'm having a really hard time. About two years ago I found out my partner of eleven years had a porn addiction that he was very well hiding behind my back. I've tried every which way to move forward but it eats me alive. He adamantly denies that there was any physical attraction in any form and I just can't stomach it. He has tried to talk about it and explain to me that he was beating himself up. I appreciate his willingness to try to give me insight but his denial of physical desire to other women is what's driving me nutty. Is it possible for a man to think the girls in porn are disgusting and to have no lust, desire or attraction to any of them? Because this is what's he claiming and I feel like it's bullshit. I understand too that I'm hurt and angry and therefore not seeing anything clearly. I've even admitted to him a crush I've had for the past few years...that yes I developed a raging attraction to someone else. He still won't budge claiming he's not gay but it had nothing to do with the women.