Is long distance worth it?

Question

Our stay at home order just got extended and my boyfriend wants to move back home (5 hours). I haven’t seen him in 2 months. If he moves back, we would barely talk so I am unsure if I can endure long periods without communication w him. Should I try long distance or break it off? We have been together for roughly a year. I feel like the universe is testing me. I don’t want to end things, but I am miserable and lonely without him. We don’t text during the day, but we usually video chat at night. If he moves, the calls will most likely stop or it will be weekly if I’m lucky.

Answer

Is there a reason why you’d barely talk if he moves back? That part isn’t clear. Every relationship is different. I’d been dating my husband a year and a half when he got orders to Japan. We weren’t married and I have an amazing career so I didn’t go with him and I stayed in California. We weren’t living together when he left. We did this for two years. The longest time we spent without seeing each other in person was about six months. You have to communicate well- in some ways I think we do a way better job of communicating than other couples because we had to do this. That said- long distance or not you need to keep your own life and some independence and not rely solely on your partner for everything. And like others said, come up with boundaries that work for both of you. We made sure we did a video chat at least once per week, calls happened casually, usually around every other day and texts throughout the day. The time difference made a big impact on that. You both have to be willing to put in the effort and do check-ins with one another.

Answer

You gotta make it worth it. Communication becomes even more important with long distance. Gotta talk to him.

Answer

It’s not for everyone. It was for me and my husband, we did long distance for almost 3 years before we moved to the same city (and then waited 4 months to move in together), but Idk if I would do it again with someone else. It’s really really hard. The longest period we went without seeing each other was 6 months. 
The fact is that couples just aren’t meant to be apart like that... it can work though but for the short term, where there is a greater purpose and finality to it, not as an indefinite thing.

Answer

It’s not for everyone. Both of you need to want it in order for it to work and you both need to put in effort. I did it for 4 years. It was hard, but we both wanted the relationship to work out. It’s worth it if you love the person enough.

Answer

You have to have effort from both sides. Maybe set up some kind of agreement on a routine. If he cant put in any effort, you should talk to him about whether he wants to continue to have a relationship with you or not

Answer

I met my husband in college, we had two weeks together before he moved to his home town and started working full time. I lived 3 hours away and worked full time as well. We didn’t talk much but worked through it. It has its ups and downs but when you truly love someone you make it work. We did this for a year.

Is long distance worth it?

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