I feel bad that I didn't like my birth....

My daughter is almost 4 and I want to give her a sibling. Me and my husband are speaking to an adoption agency. I feel like a terrible mother for not liking my birth and being traumatized. When I was in labor, my epidural failed so I was feeling everything. My husband was trying to be helpful, but he was in pain himself. We didn't really know what was going on with me. I was waiting for the doctor to come check me because I was hoping I was fully dilated, but ny husband was having such bad pain he was hunching over in pain. The nurse had to get someone to help him and they had to take him to the emergency unit of the hospital. I had no idea what was going on and it was scarring me. Soon I had to push. I pushed for 30 minutes and ny baby's heartbeat started to drop. I wasn't progressing and her heartbeat was droping so they did a cesarean. I lost a lot of blood and seriously thought I was gonna die. Baby was okay, but they almost lost me and I was all alone. After she was born I still hadn't heard from my husband. What ended up happening was his appendix burst. He had to get it removed. Talk about terrible timing. But we all three made it out of this ok. I do wish my birth wasn't so traumatizic so I would want to be pregnant again. And I feel awful I didn't enjoy the birth of my daughter.