Fear of losing my husband?

I love him so much that every time he goes outside I fear losing him. I’m always worried every time he goes out. 😢 I don’t want him to die or anything bad to happen to him or anyone to do anything to him we have been threw a lot fights and all I cheated once but he forgave me because we were at a time that we barely had sex and fought every day all day and night. We dated for four years and married almost two years. I’m sorry for everything I’ve called him and even Dow I cheated months ago my husband is the one I will always love because he is the one that sleeps with me every night I love his smell I love to smell him kiss him hug him hear his voice.