Why is it so difficult forget how people behave sometimes or the words they use

Question

I can't forget and I don't think I will ever forget that my mom told me that my dad ( who passed away) would be ashamed of me when I tried to set some boundaries with her and corrected her about her snatching my kid away from me OR "learning to close the door when she opens it". Ashamed is such a strong word to digest. Especially quoting it for a person who isn't alive anymore. Am I being over sensitive?

Answer

Nope. I’ve forgiven my mom but will always be guarded around her. When my parents divorced she dated and eventually married an egotistical womanizing narcissistic alcoholic who brainwashed her. We had to go to therapy for our damaged relationship because of him, she cancelled the first session w a bs excuse and our actual first visit first words out of her mouth to our therapist was “I don’t know what the issue is but you need to fix her”. Her new boyfriend/husband and her were arguing once- he and I never got along because I wasn’t afraid to call him on his BS- but they were arguing and didn’t know I was home and he said I was lazy, a piece of shit, freeloader, wanted the world handed to me on a platter and I’d never amount to anything. She never even stood up for me. She eventually divorced him and is a much better mother which is why I’ve forgiven her, but I will never forget what happened and will always be a bit guarded around her.

Why is it so difficult forget how people behave sometimes or the words they use

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