Is it just hormones?

Lately I’ve had a bad urge to just want to have sex I’m not in relationship I’m talking to someone but we never really got around to having sex. It may sound crazy but I get emotional sometimes because I really want to have sex. I’ve never had good sexual experiences at that so it’s a mixture of craving good intimacy with someone and enjoying it and also purging my urge to want to have sex. I had someone I was gonna have sex with but he kinda treats me shitty so I don’t think it’s worth pressing for at this point. I also masturbate but I crave touch this sounds so awful but it’s true my hands and a toy can only do so much I feel awful I won’t die without it but gosh I feel sad and just angry kinda. Also hooking up isn’t the best option at the moment due to past experiences that have traumatized me it’s probably best to just keep masturbating but I really wish I had a consistent sex life.