Overlooking Red Flags or Is Everything Ok

So my bf and I have been dating for 9 months. I’m his first gf ever. For context we are both 26. Through the 9 months I’ve spoken to him 4 times about his behavior with us that just seemed off.

1. I spoke to him about how his communication with me on a daily/ weekly basis wasn’t enough for me and I’d like to see him and speak to him more now that we are a couple. For me I’d like to check in each day even if we aren’t seeing each other. He would go 24-48 hours without saying a word to me. I brought this up and he said “I’ve never been in consistent contact with anyone before” when he said that I was mad and heard excuses but then his contact with me has boosted and we chat everyday just to check in etc even if we aren’t meeting up.

2. I told him that I find it odd that we don’t hang out together. When we were courting I saw him once a week but we talked about how often we can see each other now that we are dating and I said 2-3 is good for me. He agreed but then I wouldn’t see him for a week or he wouldn’t ask me to hangout or go out and I didn’t like that. I told him it bothers me that I have to remind him that I’m alive and willing and wanting to hang with him. I’m his gf not a friend you see every two weeks or so.

He said “I’m getting used to having someone I can invite to go do things with etc” at first that made me mad because I’m like how do you forgot about me? Since that convo he invites me to hangout and we have a good schedule and even a date jar.

3. This sounds sad and insecure but I told him I felt like he never compliments me or my hair or my outfits. But when he talks about one of his girl-friends he’ll say “oh what she did was so cute, or her hair was so nice, or her personality is so cute” etc and I felt some type of way because I barely got compliments. I told him how that made me feel and he said “well I don’t compliment much because I feel like if I overly compliment it loses it’s value plus when I get a lot of compliments it makes me uncomfortable” and that was a big flag to me because how do you not want to tell your partner how much you adore them? After that convo and telling him how I feel he’s been complimenting me regularly enough but that still bothers me.

4. We rarely get intimate because of his own shortcomings which I don’t mind, my sex drive is very low and so is his. But he still doesn’t flirt with me, or calls me sexy etc but then I saw how he was following women with explicit content on social media and I told him how none of them look like me and how us not having intimacy regularly compared to his liking and following daily comes off that he isn’t attractive to me at all. He says “to me they are just pictures, but I get where you’re coming from” which was decent to hear. I didn’t tell him he couldn’t follow them because all I can say is what are my boundaries and go from there. That same night he unfollowed them from Instagram but mad his tiktok following private. Which I then saw how he was still following said explicit pages on tiktok.

Im definitely a say it once and nothing again type of person. So far I’ve said things once and he’s changed his behavior for the better but something in me just tells me these are bare minimum things a man who says he loves me should be doing already but then another part of me wants to be understanding that this is his first relationship. But then people say men know exactly what they’re doing, and to not give the benefit of the doubt.

Each time I brought things up he has been very patient and understanding of what I’ve said. We didn’t fight it raise our voices which I’ve never done before with any past relationship that I have had.

But still I’m unsure.