Long Distance Custody with a Newborn

I am currently pregnant and the dad has been nothing but rude and hurtful trying to act like he doesn’t know the baby is his after being told by not only me but my doctors and nurses that he is the only possible father.

I am 10 weeks pregnant and live in Idaho, but I’m moving to Tennessee. I already asked him about this and he said it was fine. My family offered a free apartment, six figure job and a car to him if he also moved to Tennessee to help me raise the baby. He refused the offer because he “doesn’t see himself living in Tennessee”. He has never been there.

Anyway, I’ll be delivering in Tennessee, so all our custody will go through Tennessee courts. Tennessee has very strict laws and is often considered a “mom state”, I would say significantly more than Idaho. My dad is an attorney and has told me that the father will have to move to Tennessee to gain any custody.

Tennessee courts say that newborn-2yr olds should see each parent every other day to have a close bond (breastfeeding is also protected so the father has to bring the baby to the mother unless she has given him milk or an okay on formula), from 2-5years old, it is every 2 days, from 5-13 it is every 3 days and then from 13+ it is a week (this is just the standard).

The dad has no real plan, his mother says they will try to get him a job at his aunts company (when a spot opens up) that will allow him to travel to Tennessee for work. I know a judge can’t make an order on a possible job with sporadic work trips.

Does anyone else have this issue? I would love to split custody 50/50 but he would have to live in the state for the first 13 years of her life and he just seems uninterested.