Am I overreacting with MIL?

Question

My son has many allergies, especially with pet dander. My dear MIL is a full time RN but puppysits on the side. The rules when she comes to visit us to wash her hair shower and wear clothes we give her. She complains about having to wash hair and I caught her and my DH, her son, aka mommy’s boy, lying to me that the dog isn’t there. I told my husband he’s only hurting our son by lying bc she comes with dog hair and he flares up. I’m so over trying to protect my son from people who don’t care

Answer

I think making her wash her hair is a bit excessive. I do think you’re overreacting. I’m sure she could easily change into clothes that do not have pet dander at her home. Is your son not able to take any allergy medication to help? How serious is his allergy?

Answer

I would be pissed. My daughter suffers food allergies. When she have allergies she breaks out in hives and would violently throw up so many times til she has nothing more to throw up. From my personal experience and my own opinion, the consequences is the child suffers and us moms have to deal with this by taking them to the hospital. Your mother in law is a nurse, she have no excuse not to follow what you ask her to do. I know if my mother in law intentionally give my daughter the food she’s allergic to just to test the water (she talked about it) I would press charge against her. So no you’re not overreacting.

Answer

That is pretty selfish of them and ridiculous that they wouldn’t want to keep your son safe!

Answer

No, I would be pissed too.

Answer

Your husband is the problem here.

Answer

Your child, your wishes. Regardless of how severe his allergy is or isn’t - doesn’t really matter as far as I’m concerned. Point is, you have rules in place to protect your child, and if she isn’t willing to abide by them, that’s disrespectful to you as the parent, and your son, who will suffer an allergic reaction. Not an overreaction to be pissed she’s not taking his allergy seriously. And when he flares up, I’d send her photos and tell her THIS is why I ask that you do everything in your power to keep him from having an allergic reaction - as over-the-top as you may think it is, it’s necessary to keep him from breaking out. 
I suffer from chronic urticaria - mine is unfortunate triggered by stress, but anyway - I can totally sympathize with your frustration and especially with your son. Idk what his reaction entails, but I literally break out in patches of hives which flare up into a large rash the size of a dinner plate, lasts MONTHS, is extreme itchy, bruises under the skin, fades, I get a little break in between flare ups and then the cycle repeats itself.

This is an example of what I mean…this is a patch that was finally healing

This was a patch that was still flaring. The border welts up before it starts to smooth out and heal and is itchy and tender. 
Not fun

Am I overreacting with MIL?

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