The Biggest, Fattest, Negative.

This is my first month TTC since our miscarriage at the end of the summer. Somehow, this BFN hurts worse than any before. Part of me feels like it wasn't even real- like it was a fluke and it will be impossible for me to ever be pregnant again. I don't know how to console myself right now. I know so many women feel this way but I can't bare to see that single line. I'm absolutely devastated.