I'm nineteen,

I would have been 3 months pregnant on the 10th of December. When my friends that knew asked how I was feeling I couldn't tell them. I didn't know how I felt. And today the dam broke I haven't been able to think about the baby and not cry. When I missed 2 periods I knew that I was pregnant but then one day I just started to bleed. It hurt so bad I couldn't get off my knees. I felt like I was being gutted from the inside. Nothing I did would make it stop hurting. The one person who sorta helped me through is pregnant, our due dates were in the same month. I would have been due on the 3rd or 4th of July and she's due on the 19th of July. She posted her ultrasound picture and a photo of her 10 week belly to facebook. I'm happy for her but it hurts so bad to see them. I wish that I didn't hurt to see them. I wish that I could stop crying and sniffing but every time I think I'm ok that I'm gonna stop crying I start again