Hiring a Nanny - Best Practices

GROUND RULES

These are the ground rules to a successful hiring experience as well as maintaining a great relationship with your nanny. These rules are based on 12+ years of both personal experience as well as thousands of questions and responses on our Park Slope Parents Advice group. You can add to most of these rules the clause "unless you agree on something different before hiring." Everything is negotiable, but it's difficult after the hire to re-negotiate things that are standard practice in the area without appearing stingy and creating a strained work environment.

Have a written work agreement. The work agreement you have with your nanny will list pay, vacation, exact holidays, sick days, and other important things that will come up in the future that may be unforeseeable or even impossible now. Trust us on this one, you'll save yourself awkwardness and misunderstanding if something is in writing to refer to.

Don’t cut corners in hiring. This is a complex, time-consuming process if you are starting from scratch. While it feels easy to "go with your gut," (which we do recommend you trust!), you should back it up by checking multiple references, observing the nanny more than once with your child, and having a trial period before you commit to a long-term employment situation.

Know what type of working situation you are offering. Will you be working from home? Do you need flexible start/end times but can guarantee enough hours to give a nanny financial security? Are you planning on having more kids down the line? Will you want to modify your nanny’s hours when your kids start school? Knowing what you are offering will allow you to find the right fit and set appropriate expectations.

Remember that the overwhelming majority of nannies are good, honest people. However, do your homework. It's up to you to double-check references, ask the right questions, do background checks and look to the future and evolve with your kid(s)’ needs. Even if your best friend used a potential nanny, give yourself the peace of mind that comes with crossing your t’s and dotting your i’s.

Know who YOU are so you can hire the right nanny for your family. You need to look inside yourself to see what kind of manager you'll be. If you prefer to have lots of control, make sure you hire a person who can handle that level of micro-management. Need the nanny to be proactive or reactive? To be self-sufficient? You'll need to find that person.

This is an employer/employee relationship. No matter how much you (and she) feel she is "part of the family," knowing yourself is important in making the right choice for a nanny.

Realize that having a nanny can be an emotional experience like no other. Power issues, personal issues, privacy issues, class/race issues - all of these can create emotions that may bring uncomfortable feelings. While it is an incredible relief to have someone help you take care of your child(ren), it can also stir up a lot of feelings about what you want to provide for your family. This unique relationship will hopefully grow stronger over time but keeping your feelings in check and communicating is integral to the process.