Thinking dangerous thoughts...

I'm tired of every time I go to the doctors they tell me "don't be surprised if you have a repeat c section" it's so frustrating that I don't want to be pregnant anymore. I have no one to talk to bc my "SO" is at the beach and left me to be home alone. I'm at my breaking point that I'm thinking of unhealthy ways to bring on labor just so it's done with... 😪