So my husband just told me not to get mad..

And said he bought a pack of cigarettes and smoked in the past month because he was upset about losing our baby. I feel upset because I didn't think he could hide something like that and made me scared of what else he could hide from me if he ever wanted too. Plus I'm an ex chain smoker, I smoked a pack of day for 6 years, he had never smoked in his life.. So I guess it hurts my feelings because he knows how strongly I feel about cigarettes, and because he's been talking about other's smoking while doing it himself! Also, I feel like it's my fault and I can't control my body. What if God forbid I had another miscarriage what would he do to feel better then? I just wish he'd of come to me. I know to some it will seem like I'm overreacting, but it is a slippery slope. I was only openly upset with him for an hour or so because I don't want to drag it out, but emotionally I don't know how I feel about this. And now he's openly saying he wants a baby, but I haven't even had a period since my miscarriage yet and it's been six weeks. So I can't even try yet because I have no idea what's going on in my cycle. I just feel helpless, wish I could just have a baby and make him and myself two of the happiest most loving parents ever.