13dpo- bfn - af due today -crazy symptoms-still hope??

I am suppose to get af today. Since about  3 dpo ive had constant cramps and backache. Very bloated and have just felt off. Last month I had my tubes flushed (hsg) and doc said I'll be very fertile this month. We've been ttc for 5 months now and this month felt completely different than all the rest. I was convinced this was my month!  Ive taken 4 pg tests, all bfn. I feel I am going crazy. Should I still hold on hope?  I feel that im out : /