Aggressive boyfriend? Abuse?

My boyfriend and I are really intentional about fostering a healthy relationship, but have been straining lately due to the state of both our healths. He would never physically hurt me or in any other "classic" way when it comes to what "typical" (even though it looks different for everyone and all trauma is valid). However, he'll get really angry towards me and hit something nearby (i.e. punch through a wall, break a bottle, etc) and I always get fearful and flinch as if I were about to be hit. He was socialized into being okay with expressing emotion that way and uses it as a coping skill, but it is also a huge and known trigger of my diagnosed severe ptsd and trauma. I understand with other things such as being scared when someone is clearly being playful or if fireworks went off, but this seems to be in a tricker place. I REALLY REALLY NEED INSIGHT AND LOVE THE eve COMMUNITY ✨✨🌈