How do I get my life back?

I’m 38. Ttc since my 35th birthday. I definitely have let stress get in my way for most of it, after one month I thought I had symptoms and got so excited... and each month since then has been similar in one way or another. About a year in, I decided to quit my job and focus on taking good care of myself and trying not to stress. Two years later I know I need to just get back to work, but I just can’t seem to get myself out of the house. I’m definitely struggling with depression, and feel like I just can’t get myself out of this rut. Anyone been here before and gotten through it? Any suggestions? I am afraid that I can’t keep my emotions in check for work. I’m tired, hopeless, and so very sad.