Mother in law

So our mother in law is staying with us so I could work this past month. All daycares were full and we are still on a waiting list (for our 11 month old) .. anyway ..

Last weekend our daughter (my step daughter) ended up breaking one of our house rules.. and i had her call her dad about it since he was not there. Long story short.. his mom came and confronts me and says why don’t you love her.. and I replied I do.. and she said you care more about your dogs than her.. said a bunch of other stuff and i was basically crying. This all stemmed from our daughter throwing away her food after she was told to finish it the meat atleast.. she ended up throwing the meat away. Her gma was like is it that big of a deal.. all i had her do was call her dad and tell him about it..

Our oldest is with us 50/50. The other home is very opposite and it is hard because of the extreme differences in our parenting style..

I basically feel like i cant trust her. Even with my own daughter, i feel like she will not do what is right to help the child grow.

When she said all this stuff to me she basically was like i dont want to affect our relationship or you and your husband. But I feel like it has. I feel so uncomfortable. I know she doesnt agree with how we parent and her voicing it over something that was from the result of our oldest choices makes me feel like she doesn’t like me.

Afterwards she acted like it never happened and everything was fine. I did explain my position and she seemed to understand where i was coming from.

Later my husband talked to her and asked do you really believe that she cares about the dogs more than her and she said well she loves on them a lot.

I was raised with an extremely emotionally disconnected mom and a lot of animals. I found it very hurtful that she said that dog thing to me because i never thought poorly of my mom about loving me or not. I do a lot for our step daughter and she gets so much more than i got as a child. And it makes me feel like im not enough and i am constantly trying.. yes i am very affection with animals, i was raised that way.. i just feel like it was an insult to my life.. like i wont be enough unless i just shower hugs and kisses.

Idk if it is my hormones but I am just done with her being in my home. And her husband came and visited me jst waved goodbye to me after hugging everyone else.

Sorry rant over..