Lack of intimacy & fighting

Hey ladies. My husband and I have been together for 3 years and we are celebrating our 2nd year of marriage in November. We’ve actually been living together since our 2nd moth together. Fast, I know🤦🏼‍♀️.

Our relationship is pretty bipolar. Well have really great days then BAM! The worst days ever with a lot of fighting and irritation from one another. For example: he’ll be lovable with kisses hugs and I love you’s and we’ll be intimate, hell even help me around the house no issues; then the next minute he’s refusing intimacy for weeks, won’t touch me or anything and will fight me on helping with the intent of being lazy for absolutely no reason.

Side note with the intimacy: he’s not cheating. I know that’s probably one of your first thoughts. We have access to each other’s phones. So we can’t hide anything. Why? We are rebuilding a lot of broken trust still from a little over a year ago when he chose to cheat and sleep with multiple people. Before and after we were married. So far so good and I’m praying it stays in the right direction. Especially for our daughters sake.

I don’t ask for much help; just maybe empty the dishwasher or put the clothes away for me. I’m home right now with our daughter so I do the rest of the cleaning. Don’t get me started about the issues he gives me to help me with the baby when I don’t feel good; I have horrible gallstone flare ups right now to where I can’t lift or move much because of the pain.

It’s just a vicious cycle. We can’t afford counseling right now but we do want to see someone when we can afford it. He’s going into the military so I’m hoping the distance will help us since we’ve been under the same roof for what feels like forever!!

Any advice?

What could I be doing wrong to where he won’t touch me or help? I may have my problems with anger; I have PTSD (not medicated by choice) but I’ve worked hard on the outbursts to where they are extremely rare so those aren’t the problem anymore. So I’m lost.