So I had my baby 9 months ago.

I’m so down.

My relationship is shit. He makes me feel like shit. He makes me feel useless and

Hopeless. I weight maybe 90 pounds. I’ve lost so much weight. I take care of the baby by myself 24/7. He doesn’t help me. He makes me cry 24/7. Tells me my feelings are a figure of my imagination. That I don’t need to ask him for anything. That I’m lazy because I don’t work. (We can’t afford a baby sitter).. he bitches and complains about buying the baby things, when he does hold him he will for 5 minutes then he’s telling me to get him. He hasn’t changed a diaper! I’m to the point where suicidal thoughts have been coming 24/7,

Then I look at my baby and it stops. I’m not myself anymore I feel and see it. I don’t know what to do. I’m afraid I’m going to do something I will regret😞💔