I feel like I can’t handle life anymore. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, MDD, and GAD by multiple therapists. My mental illnesses have taken over my life. I attempted suicide my freshman year of high school (I am a senior now) it was about a year after I was sexually assaulted. And my dad didn’t care that I was in pain. He told me straight to my face “If you want to kill yourself, just do it already” When I was in the fucking hospital he yelled at me telling me how I needed to try and get out quickly so he didn’t have to waste money. He told me he would get over my death within a year. I don’t know why I’m ranting on about something that’s totally unrelated to how I’m feeling now. I’m confused on how I feel right now. I keep on finding the amazing things in others and bring myself down by telling myself all of the bad things about me. And there are just so many bad things. I’m sorry this is a pity post about how sad my life is I’m just so done. I wish I could get better but my parents don’t and won’t listen on how to help me. They won’t let me go on medication and barely let me see a therapist. Maybe it’s time to give up. I keep on pushing the date back on when I’m going to do it and I feel like I should just get it done and over with.