Do you know who you are outside of being a mom?

Question

I feel like I’m struggling so hard with this. I feel like all I know is mom life/having babies/pregnancy. I started thinking: do I really want a baby or am I just bored? Am I just stuck? Because honestly deep down I know damn well my husband and I need to separate. I feel like I’m like “well, this is already my life, might as well just go with it.” But it doesn’t have to be that way, right? I’m terrified of starting over. I know I *do* want a baby, but damn I’d eventually have 3 kids with 3 different guys and that hurts my heart. I KNOW “in the end” I’ll be happy and things will work out how it’s supposed to, but man I feel so down and sad right now. I feel like I can’t start my life at this moment. 
I feel like everyone’s advice is go back to school. I have 0 interests in anything.😓 I’m 25, and I’m watching my best friend happily married and announcing her second child. All while I feel like a hot ass mess. 😓

Answer

It’s very easy to feel this way when your child/ren are small. At some point you should sit down and have a talk with yourself and see what/where you want to be. It could be an uncomfortable talk, but you gotta do it.

Answer

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I would honestly suggest seeing a therapist. I’ve never been in your specific position because I’ve never been married or had children, but I’ve definitely struggled with what I want to do. Luckily I figured it out early in life, but I would have never found the confidence to actually pursue it, if not for therapy and having a supportive boyfriend. Having a positive support system and confidence in yourself are super important. You’re still young, so you have plenty of time to figure yourself out, but just settling for something that brings you unhappiness is definitely not what you should do. Especially for your child.

Answer

I am the same age and I know who I am besides being a mom. A mom is only a fraction of who I am. Try enrolling in school, even general classes, get some hobbies, go to marriage counseling

Answer

I could have wrote this! And he gets mad at me when I tell him I dont know who I am outside of being a mom. I had my first at 18 and was a single mom with no help until he came along three years ago its literally all I know. I'm 27 now

Answer

I'm in the same boat. Trying to figure what else I am other than a mom is irritating. It's a bit disconcerting.

Do you know who you are outside of being a mom?

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