Tricky choices😕

I have been in a relationship with my current partner for 3 years now. Within those three years we have had a lot of bad happen in the relationship, we have broken up and got back together countless times. It started about 6 months into the relationship with just little selfishness tendencies that I just brushed off, after about a year and shortly after we found out I was pregnant with our first child he came over to my parents house (where I currently lived) everyone was drinking and having a good time but he got wasted and started acting like a fool, that night my older sister came up to me and told me that he had been walking up behind her and rubbing her butt and she wasn’t mad just uncomfortable and wanted me to know. It caused a huge fight between not only me and him but him and my family as well. After that his relationship with my family hasn’t been very good which made him distance himself in a time I needed him the most, my pregnancy. He would always choose his friends and going to get high over me. About 4 months after the birth of my daughter he and I had our own place and had gotten into a fight about how his porn watching was making my insecurities worse and I wasn’t ok with it, so I went to stay the weekend at my parents house and while I was gone he cheated on me with a girl he worked with. I was devastated but ended up forgiving him shortly after. After a month or so he got a job opportunity to work out on the road and he would be staying in another state until the job was done, during his stay up there he evidently got real lonely because when he came back home for a visit I found on his phone that he had downloaded dating apps with the specific place he was in, had searched for strip clubs and whore houses, was paying for a live porn site, the works. What seemed to all make it worse was that he signed up for these things on the day of our 2 year anniversary, and he barely spoke to me that day. I made him choose me or the job and he came home and I again forgave him. Down the road there wasn’t anymore cheating but the disrespect, name calling, taking off to who knows where during arguments, putting his hands on me( not punching or slapping or anything real serious like that but grabbing and shoving me, hard enough to cause bruising) I finally got fed up enough with it and left him. I packed myself and daughter up and we went to live with my parents, I was basically homeless, jobless, and had only gotten a job just days prior to leaving because I was a stay at home mom. While we were broken up I started talking to a new guy, he made me feel great and was there for me when I really needed someone to talk to. We never made anything official because it was just so soon and we hadn’t been talking for long, but we both made it clear to each other that we would be there for each other emotionally (he had also just went through a divorce). We did meet up and we let things go probably a bit too far. We were both too scared to tell the other how we were feeling about one another and that later down the road led to us being afraid it wasn’t going anywhere. During that time I had my ex messaging me apologizing and every time I would bring our child to see him he would beg for me back and make all kinds of promises. I let those words convince me to come back. I explained everything to the other guy and he was completely understanding. I even asked him what he thought I should do and he told me that if I wanted to try to save my family then I should. So I did. But after a few weeks back with my original partner things began going down hill again. It has been six months since we got back together and every promise he made has now been broken. He is nicer and tries to be more loving but when he is mad he still calls me names, and since I was with someone else when him and I were broke up his favorite thing to throw in my face is how I’m a whore, when he is mad he is the exact same person I left in the first place but now he just apologizes more. I do still love him but I don’t love him like I use to. I don’t want to hurt him or be on bad terms with him but I don’t know if I truly want to be with him anymore. And I recently seen the other guy in the store and he pulled me to the side and explained how much he regrets not telling me how he felt and how much he regrets letting me go. Now I cant stop thinking about him. I just don’t know what to do at this point. Do I keep trying to make things better with my child’s father or do I end things and try to move on. I’m so lost.

UPDATE:

I told him how I felt. That I just didn’t love him like I use to and that I just didn’t want the relationship anymore. He seemed really hurt at first. Begged me not to do it, told me how he would change and become a better man, told me there was nothing he wanted more than to have me and to have his family, he has cried a lot, had moments of anger but apologized afterwards. But just now he was on the phone with one of his friends (who also just went through a separation) and was saying all kinds of awful things about me. That I’m a whore, that I needed to get out of his house, that I’ll “be sucking some other dick” in no time. He acted one way towards me and a total other when talking with his friend. I feel like I see the real him when he is angry. Like any other time is just an act to try and get what he wants.