My marriage is falling apart 😢

I have been with my husband for 13 years. And from the start it was rough because my mom made it hell for us. She never liked him In Fact she never liked anyone I was with. But we learned to ignore her and stay together. My ex boyfriend was always a big factor in us being fighting all the time because we still remain friends and he still loved me. I still loved him too but when we broke up. I decided I wouldn’t take him back because he was abusive and controlling & he drink alot. Anyway me and my husband always fought to stay together. When I was pregnant with our second child he was talking to some girl while I was pregnant. And we had just gotten married. I was so hurt and angry I was about to leave him. He bugged me not too as we had just had our son. I forgive him and we stayed together. It took me a long time to trust him again. Right now I am going through another rough time in our marriage because I found out he was doing drugs. I have absolutely no tolerance for that in my home. I will not allow it only because my parents were both on drugs when I was a teenager growing up. And I went through hell because of it. I will not allow my kids to go through the same stuff I did. We had the biggest fight ever over this and I can’t do this anymore. My trust is completely broken and I feel like were done . It’s killing me because of my kids. Iam at the point in my marriage where I just don’t care anymore what happens, we have agreed to go to counseling but we live in such a small town they don’t have marriage counseling here can I get some advice.. please no bashing. Thank you