i want to have unprotected sex but scared

I've been with my bf for 4 years amd ive been on bc pills since i was like 11. im making sure i don't miss a day or take it a wrong.time. we did it raw a few times but stopped after 1 second cuz i was.reeally.scared. so we used condoms and we always checked before ans after sex. i want to be a little more "sensual?" and maybe drop a condom once in a while. what do you ladies think?