Disabled, widowed, and a mother

Before I start, I’m already in therapy. I don’t really know what to do. I’m waiting to hear from the social security office because I can’t work due to several reasons. If I get turned down, idk what I’m going to do. I can’t get child support because my son’s biological dad is a danger to him. My fiancé (we were married a few years ago then divorced-long story, but we got back together and he stuck by my side through my pregnancy and loved my son as his own.) and we were going to get a house a few months ago, we were going to get married, and he was going to adopt my son. but he had a heart attack at work back in February. All his money went to his brother, and uncle since he didn’t get a chance to change his will. So I was left with nothing. His family don’t help I guess since my son isn’t biological. His brother won’t even speak to me. He got him a new truck and a bunch of tattoos And someone said he’s getting a house. I made mistakes. My fiancé made mistakes, but that was YEARS ago. My son and I are living with my mom. My mom has been helping but now she’s getting to the point where she is stepping on boundaries with how I raise my child. Saying he can do this and that and things I’m just not comfortable with. She’s also buying toys that’s cluttering the house which I don’t mind but she’s GETTING MAD AT ME for there not being room for the toys. She has been accusing me of doing stuff like getting into their food cabinet (that they locked.) and not turning off a light that I remember vividly turning off. I don’t mind not getting time to myself since becoming a mom especially since she rarely watches my son, but she makes it out on Facebook like she watches my son all the time. She steals my photos. She made a remark yesterday that made it seem that I’m a bad parent and that everyone else thinks so. My son is the only reason I haven’t killed myself. He’s the only thing that puts a smile on my face. The only thing I’ve ever wanted and I wanted this all with my late fiancé. I’m trying so hard to be a good mom, I thought I could take whatever life threw at me if I had a child. But now I’m fighting thoughts I never thought I’d have. This is not how my life was supposed to be. I’ve got nowhere else to go. My mom acts like my son and I are a burden to her. She said my fiancé wasn’t my husband since we were divorced but I don’t feel that way. She has hurt me so much growing up and even now. I just want my son happy and healthy. I want his “step”dad to still be alive. I want to stop crying. I want to stop hurting. I’m so tired.