How to deal with a controlling husband? (Very long but I need guidance and support)

I know the first thing you’ll all probably say is to leave him! But the reality is that I do love him. He is my husband and we have a child together but at the same time, I can’t stand his attitude and controlling ways. He never used to be like this until after our 3 year old arrived and since then, he has a habit of telling me what to do which I now believe is probably emotional bullying. These are the things he does and probably more if I can remember:

- After I have done something, say, washed up or locked the door, he will check after me and make sure I’ve done it or he will re do it

- He is jealous when it comes to men. I deal with male clients on a regular basis as part of my laundry business, but he tells me that I am not doing this business anymore and any time I deal with males, he is coming with me when I drop off the washing

- Every time I do something, like if I cook dinner slightly early, he will say “just leave that and focus on X, that’s not important and it can wait until later”

- If I decide to organise or do some bits and bobs, he tells me not to do it now and to do X instead

- He tells me to have a shower early or to make breakfast instead of doing it later or when I feel like doing it

- Whenever I buy anything for our child or the household, he complains saying why have I been shopping again and do we even need it (we do)

- I will put clothes on my son ready to go out, he complains and says he needs to wear something else so he will dress him in something else

- If I have chose something to wear, he eyes me up and says “are you really wearing that? Aren’t you going to change into something else?”, or “put a bit of make up on and look decent, we are going out with x and y and you need to look a bit better”

- He always tells me to do something different with my hair

There’s so many more... I have put up with this for 3 years and I am starting to get really, really angry. I don’t listen or do anything he tells me but then he will give me the silent treatment and he will say I make all the decisions (sarcastically) and says I never listen to him so why am i talking to him/asking him? I tell him how it is and he says I am treating him like shit and he knows better than me.

It’s like I cannot EVER do anything for myself without him saying anything and I am fed up of arguing back with him to defend myself. I just don’t know anymore. I wanted to go doctors to find out why I am feeling really low and depressed I think the culprit is actually him :(