Doubting sexuality ?

I’ve never doubted that I’m straight as fuck, but recently mum told me that because I haven’t really shown interest in guys in awhile and have really intense friendships with my close girl friends that she’s sus of me being lesbian. I know I like men, I love dick and I’ve never really questioned it. Mum is extremely strict so I’ve never really had the opportunity to bring people home and I work 7 days a week so don’t have time to exactly socialise. My tinder got banned for no reason also. I do have intense friendships, I like to connect deeply with a small amount of people and I invest a lot of my time and effort into ensuring they’re happy. I can also distance myself very quickly for no reason. I have borderline personality disorder, depression and anxiety, so to me, it makes sense as to why my friendships are intense and inconsistent etc because it’s my disorder. Yes, I look at girls and think “wow you’re gorgeous” but never sexually or romantically, it’s more in the sense of “I’m insecure about myself and wish I looked like that”. Mum is very emotionally manipulative, I know that already. I’ve dealt with it my entire life. From calling me a slut to now calling me gay... but each time I really get caught up on it and begin to question my own identity... she told me this a couple of days ago and I just can’t stop wondering if I am gay... Like I said, not once have I questioned wether or not I’m straight. I only find men appealing romantically and sexually and I told her this to which she replied with “you might not know yet” given I’m only 18... I just feel really shit about myself and feel so embarrassed in myself for not knowing how to deal with it....

I haven’t been in a relationship since February and I’m still so in love with him. Mind you my taste is very masculine also. Maybe I’m in denial? I have no idea.. I’m so stressed. Has anyone experienced similar or could give advice etc? I just feel horrible in myself