Is it normal for a child to still self sooth even after 3 years?

Question

My older child is 3 and she’s still the same as she was when she was just a few months old. 
She doesn’t sleep unless I am there laying with her and she needs to feel my arms and face constantly . She does this during the day too when she is sitting next to me on the couch and is relaxing. Does it stop? Is there specific age if stops?

Answer

My son is 3. I don’t believe in self soothing. I rock him to sleep every night and I enjoy every minute of it. He’s also rocked for naps at daycare as well. I’ll continue to rock him to sleep until he tells me to stop.

Answer

My two year old son is like this too. At night he has to sleep with me, but not just with me, with his head on my arm and his face against mine. Hes been like this since he was a newborn. He also hates when I wear sweaters and starts crying because when I sit with him because he needs to feel my skin🤣. It's kinda annoying since I'm a cold person and need sweaters lol.

Answer

My almost 3 year old son doesn’t need me to fall asleep and actually sleeps better without me. But when we do have to share a bed (when traveling) or he’s sitting next to me relaxing, he strokes my arm or touches my face. It’s comforting to him.

Answer

My boy is the SAME WAY!!!! They eventually grow out of it, but man is it hard some nights. I have had to tell him “I love you. mommy needs a minute I am touched out right now and can’t snuggle. I will come give you a kiss when I’m done doing x”

Answer

Ugh I don’t think of this as self soothing. My 4 month old (shes older now)  gets put to bed without us holding her. There are many parenting styles, but with our family dynamics and medical challenges we sleep trained our baby girl. Best decision ever. Bath, bottle, book, change of diaper, pajamas, sleep sack then put into her crib/bed alert. Say night night, give kisses, and shut the door. She sleeps for 11.5 hours and is super happy when she wakes. 
I nannied for a family that did this and the kids slept with the mom and dad until over 7 years old. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I feel that this method is harder for care givers to complete.  
If you want the change youve got to make it happen.

Answer

This is how she’s slept for 3 years, it’s unlikely that she’s just going to decide one day that she doesn’t need to next to her anymore. If you want it to change, you’ll need to be the one initiating it

Answer

My son started back up with wanting to fall asleep with me in mine and hubby’s bed in September and he’s 3. He grabs for my arm and turns to grab for my head every once and a while but as long as he can touch my arm he’s ok. I’ll let him lay there for a few minutes to calm him down then take him to his room. There are times I fall asleep with him and he stays in bed with us. But he only does this with me. If I’m not home he can and will go straight into his bed and fall asleep on his own for Daddy!

Answer

I put no but I dont think it’s weird. MOST children by that time have learned self soothing mechanisms but some haven’t and that’s ok. Just work with her as she needs you. Try to do things that allow her to not be right with you. If she’s sleeping in bed with you try putting a bed for her in your room and slowly move her into her own room. Find a comfort object for her, create strong bedtime routines, she’ll get it eventually. No adult still sleeps in bed with their parents.

Is it normal for a child to still self sooth even after 3 years?

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