Feeling worthless

You know as this year starts I wonder again how I can always be better and look back on everything I’ve done wrong as a human being and I just wonder how I will ever be loved and how I got stuck in this body and I love my family so much but I just feel like their love is different. It’s just given. It will always be there and I know that no matter what they love me but what about someone who doesn’t look at me like that. Will there ever be someone who comes home and is excited to just see my face or my smile or hear my laugh. I wonder if I’m worthy of that. If I’m enough. How to be enough.