Insensitive friend 😓

I have this friend , she’s always been as I call wishy washy ! So before y’all say “ that’s her baby ... She can do as she pleases ..,” I understand entirely. I am the god mother of her first child . Cool , I always ask her if he needs anything or if i can come get him for the day ... Usually, no answer or he’s already got plans for the day . He may already have his needs for the time being. No problem She got pregnant last year and she decided to ask me to adopt her child . I was in hysterics as it looks like I’ll never be able to produce my own child. So then I start talking to lawyers , writing up contracts and stuff . She informs me that the father , who is also the dad of the first born , wants to get an abortion . I told her , the day i took her in and she we found out together that she was pregnant.. I would support her no matter her decision. She did not get an abortion , she told him that she was going to adopt out the baby to me ... He threw a fit!

He told her that any child that she gets pregnant with , if they don’t abort it , they will keep it ! She called me all the time crying about how he did not want this baby . How she wanted the baby but knew she couldn’t afford it . How she didn’t want to do it all alone all over again . Mind you ! I’ve been in my god child’s life since he was born .

She’s about 4/5 months pregnant at the time . I had been trying to find a new lawyer and had set aside money for a baby shower and the baby’s needs for the first couple of months! Then she TEXT me the most heart wrenching news... “ I’m keeping the baby .I can’t do it..” At first , I cried . I was looking forward to being a mother ! I was looking forward to seeing my SO happily chasing after his child . All the trips we would take , time we would spend together ... The whole 9 yards !!! All that went down the drain...

As we agreed , I’d still be the god mother to said child . Cool ! All while i’m trying to spend time with my god son or just give her some time to rest as she needed ! She never let me come pick up my first god son . It was always some piss poor excuse . Ok fine... No big deal ... The father to her children got into a fight with her family and they both got kicked out , moved in with some of his peoples !

Everything was going smooth other than the fact that i had to pull teeth to get my god son just for a couple of hours . I’ve always asked if she was uncomfortable with me or my SO caring for her child , she said no ! Ok..

I start to just sit in the house with them and play with my god son . I want to build a great bond so that he never feels awkward around his god parents like I did with mine . We had officially agreed that i would be the one to take them to the hospital when her cesarean was decided . The NIGHT BEFORE , the woman they live with came to me and said ... “ Don’t get mad but I’m the god mother of this next baby .” I’m lost ... I was confused as I had been put on the spot in front of my “friend” , her baby daddy , and the woman’s husband. Then she tells me , a boy can have two god fathers but only one god mother. A girl can have two god mothers but only one god father ! My friend DID NOT stand up for me at all ! Her baby daddy then joked that i would cry in the car about it ,

my feelings were hurt , but as usual ... I played it off . When I got in the car... I BAWLED MY EYES OUT. She asked me to adopt , then took it back ... Asked me to be the god mother , then let SOMEONE ELSE THAT SHE HAD MET THE DAY THEY MOVED IN , strip me of my title. My anxiety was kicking in , so i went home.

The next day they all wanted me to come in , but i refused ... I didn’t want to go in the house , I just wanted to get them to the hospital and be a decent friend . I stayed in that hospital for 10 hours , long enough for her to go back into surgery and give birth . Everyone was fine and healthy afterwards . At the time , only one person was allowed back into her recovery room , ok ... not a big deal We switched out so she could talk to me , he baby daddy apologized for making the comment, that he made... I told him to save the pity !

I go in there and we talked , my heart was hurting all day , I just wanted to go home.... but i made a promise and I was going to stick to it . I stayed with her until she went to go see the baby . She kept making comments when she talked to the baby . Pointing him in my direction and saying , “There’s your other mommy .” Excuse me ? Then she realized what she had said and apologized. Not even 4 hours after having the child , her baby daddy says , “ let’s try one more time for a girl .” Even though she has almost died twice , giving birth to BOTH of their kids . Then she makes the insensitive ass comment to me . “ If i get pregnant any time soon , you’re adopting it .” Why !? Why would you say that to me ? Why would you make that comment..... I can’t do this anymore!! It’s hard seeing everyone have families but me . Whenever I hang out with friends , all they talk about would be their kids . Every time I make a new friend , she ends up pregnant. I hate this life ... I hate everything about it . I’ve been so focused on getting my weight in check because i weight 50 lbs more than i should ... I haven’t focused on trying as much anymore . I’m tired of the friend this story is about and her insensitive remarks... She used to understand how i felt, because we both thought we could not get pregnant... now look ... I’m so sorry it’s everywhere . I just needed to get it out ... 😭