Abusive relationship but i love him

I need to know if I should leave my current boyfriend. I love him with everything inside me, we have been through soooo much together. He’s my best friend, i don’t have many friends or family. When it’s good it’s AWESOME but when it’s. bad it’s really bad and he gets really disrespectful. But he isn’t nice to me, but to his friends he would do anything for. We live together and have for two years. He’s rude majority of the time. Him and his dad didn’t know he was on speaker phone and he heard me speaking just about something and he goes “shut up” and my boyfriend proceeds to tell me that “I need thicker skin” I have VERY thick skin, my childhood wasn’t great. But it was uncalled for nonetheless. He somewhat financially supports me and I’m not sure what to do. I see posts on here and videos on the internet and it makes me sad. I want that kind of love and I deserve it. I’m an excellent girlfriend. this has only been happening since probably September of last year when we had a robbery in our home. He always apologizes for being rude to me but I haven’t seen much progress at all. I feel like I’m missing out on someone who would love me (I’m 23 he’s 25) unconditionally the way i love him. He’s emotionally abusive sometimes and then he will apologize just so I will stop talking. We do have A LOT going on but that’s no excuse I don’t disrespect him. I just don’t know what to do. My mother is toxic I’ve tried moving out and living with her and that didn’t end well. I’d be living with my sister and her boyfriend which is fine because she’s my best friend but I don’t really have money to be doing this... someone guide me in the right direction. There’s so much love there but he’s so mean to me sometimes. I’ve tried and tried and tried but it just doesn’t seem to be working. I don’t know if that’s due to all of this stress or what. I don’t just want to give up.