Any Italian/Italian-American moms?

Question

I’m first generation Italian, my parents are from Italy and I find that my parenting styles are different than my non-Italian friends. 
For example, my 20 month old eats a lot of pasta and carbs, I make him minestrone and I spoon feed him a lot still, he also loves Plasmon biscotti with milk before bed. I make finger foods but he would sit there and play with it and throw them and not eat. I become upset with myself when he doesn’t eat his meals, I always feel a fed baby is a happy baby. 
He also sleeps in bed with me and my husband and I don’t let anyone except my husband and my mom babysit him. So many times my friends will say I baby him too much and I need to let go a bit, but this is just the way my family does things. Is anyone else the same way?

Answer

I am American but am in Europe, in my husband’s home country now.  My son was born here.  I don’t know if this is particularly about cultures.  I think it’s just more about the individuals.  I do a lot of the same things for my son who is 22 months except he does sleep in his own crib.    I have been the only caregiver since birth.  My husband has taken him out a couple times on his own and stayed only one day with him at home.  Other than that, no one else!  I do help him eat most of his meals.  I rock him to sleep at bedtime still.  I get up with him at night when he wants water or just soothing.  I dress him.  But I also encourage his independence and curiosity.  He helps to clean up his toys, helps empty out the washer, asks for things he wants, helps open doors, turn on/off lights, helps with preparing dinner, etc.  He listens well and gets through a tantrum quickly.  I don’t interact with any other moms with kids my son’s age here, so I don’t have comparisons really.  But I have noticed one big thing.  When we are out(park, stroll, store), I talk with my son and he talks with me.  Other people, especially moms with kids around same age, look at me like they are seeing something outrageously strange.  Maybe they overhear that I speak English with him, but sometimes they aren’t close enough to hear me.  I can see that my son is more engaged while we are out when other kids around the same age don’t speak, don’t even move.  So anyway, I just think it’s more about the specific people rather than a culture.  I should mention, I wasn’t raised the way my son is.  But I can definitely see and appreciate your point of view.

Answer

I married into a Greek family - fresh off the boat into Ellis Island after WW2. Needless to say I parent completely different from his family. They push food like crazy. 
I would recommend you look on Instagram for these resources: Feeding Littles, New Ways Nutrition, and Mama Knows Nutrition. It helps to understand little tummies. Keep on feeding what you want your little one to eat - lots of pasta? No problem! But maybe look into just to understand the why and how on building a balanced meal. Who cares if you give baby 5 servings of pasta a day - but maybe pair it with some spinach or green beans and some nice ricotta cheese? Its all about balance. 
Also, I love Feeding Littles because they teach you how Not to pressure kids. Our Yia Yia is always trying to make us all overeat and then says we are all fat - I’m trying to loose weight and she’s trying to shove heavy carbs and sweets down my throat and my baby too!
So I guess what I’m trying to say is there is a fine line and we must all find balance. Keep on feeding baby. Don’t pressure yourself or baby, and certainly don’t feel shame. You’re not the first Italian mama I know that loves carbs! 🤣 I know plenty of non Italian families that focus a lot on pasta and breads.

Any Italian/Italian-American moms?

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