Step daughter drama

Hello ladies

Warning !!! This post might be long but I really need some momma advice.

I’ve been with my husband for 4 years and my step daughter is 6. We have full custody of her and her momma sees her every 1st,3rd and 5th Saturday of the month. She hasn’t seen her since March of this year. My step daughter has been misbehaving for 2 years straight. She’s been getting in to trouble at school and now that we have todo it virtual she wants nothing todo with it. Her school has her in this program where they try to help her do her work and that isn’t working. She is on meds for ADHD but her doctor doesn’t think she has ADHD. I was tell her her psychologist that I believe she’s ODD.

She hits me , bites me and locks me in our storage room when I go in to look for something. I love this little girl so much but no matter what I do it isn’t good enough. She loves her mom and I won’t take that from her. Her mom is on 10 years probation and continues to mess up. My step daughter doesn’t think her mom does any wrong. She does tell us that she’s angry with her mom because she doesn’t spend time with her and that she works at a bar. I love my husband but I feel that I can’t take the abuse of my step daughter any more. I cry everyday. When she sees me cry she thinks it’s funny. Me and my husband have a 2 year old and I have a 13 year old. I thinking about leaving because I feel like I’m the problem for my step daughter and I don’t want my husband to have to choose. It will devastate our 2 year old because she loves her daddy so much. Family and friends keep saying to either take away any visitation with mom or give her back to mom. My husband has to be the one to take charge in that because it is his daughter even though I do everything for her. Can I get some advice from y’all