My sanity in my marriage needs help

Warning: this is long. Thank you if you read all the way through. I haven’t been here in awhile but I needed a safe place to vent and maybe get some help. My husband and I have been together for 7 years. Married 4 of those. For most of that relationship or sex life was usually and every other day thing. He has always had a high sex drive. Like he wants it daily if not multiple times. It’s ALWAYS in his mind. Now with our daughter, I’m soooo exhausted all of the time. Sex isn’t really the top thing on my mind. I work and I do 95% of caring for her. I’m tired. That’s not saying he’s not helpful, he is. He does a lot of a outdoor work and helps around the house. He also has an amazing job and works hard. Anyways, my sex drive isn’t what it used to be. Even before my daughter, he wanted it more often then me. Now it’s becoming an issue in our relationship. He literally wants sex daily. Our typical right now is around every 2-3 days. I feel like that’s not the end of the world and he acts like it is...I know couples who are lucky to have sex once a week or every other. Our sex life is very uneventful right now and not just because it’s not as often as he wants it but because he’s never been one to last long. He literally gets inside of me and finishes in under a minute. This has been this way our entire relationship. I’ve never been one to care because I get off other ways and I love him more than how long he lasts but could this be an issue I’m not realizing I have? I only get pleasure from when he gives oral and that just gets old sometimes. Maybe i don’t think about it as much as him because I don’t have the orgasm to look forward to with sex. I don’t know what to do. To top it off, ive been begging him for more affection our entire relationship. He’s not a cuddler, doesn’t initiate hand holding. Only kisses to go to bed or when one of us is leaving. To me, affection is more important than sex. Hell, affection actually helps me get in the mood. And I’ve told him that countless times. That maybe if there was more affection I would get to a point that I would want it more.. it never changes though. I always feel like he’s going to leave me if he’s not getting what he wants but I also know that he isn’t that kind of person. He and I are best friends and our intimacy seems to be our only issue. He wants me only and wants me to just change it so that we are having it more. He’s so stubborn that he literally doesn’t see my side. That I’m an exhausted mom of a 1 1/2 year old that has a million things running through my head and have been more forgetful than ever since having a child. That sometimes I’d rather just go to bed after she’s asleep or lay together on the couch and watch our favorite show for an hour. Immediately though to him, if I try to cuddle with him, he assumes it’s to initiate sex. So it “gets his hopes up” as he says, and when it doesn’t happen he gets pissy. Makes me not want to even cuddle with him because he expects it to lead elsewhere. Do I just give him what he wants to keep him happy? Even if it’s not really what I want? I tell myself I should do this just so he has the release and it’s not lik it would take all evening. But if he wants more and I’m not in the giving mindset then I’d just be doing it for him and not me..Is he the issue? Unrealistic sex drive? Is it me? Please help me. Or if you have any suggestions on how I can get my sex drive up or help him to last longer? We’ve tried a few things but nothing seems to help. We’ve tried new things to spice it up but it doesnt work because he cums too fast and then it’s just done.. 🤦🏼‍♀️ I literally woke up with my daughter at 6:00 this morning to a text that I “must have forgot that he wanted it lastnight”. Let me last add because it just came to my mind. He’s not a dominant lover..he doesn’t come at me when he’s wanting it. Or initiate unless it’s through text. He waits for me to start everything.. I want him to be that “get over here” type and he’s not..my gosh this is making him sound bad and that wasn’t my intention. 😞I barely keep myself together and up kept since becoming a mom. I’ve lost myself in a way and can’t seem to find Me. I feel like all I think about is everyone else..So this just makes me feel like I’m a horrible person.