I am in desperate need of advice on how to explain anxiety to my 11 year old.

I have pretty bad anxiety (and PTSD) that is triggered when overstimulated. My son also has ADHD and terrible impulse control. He is constantly jumping on me, coming to hug me but then won’t let go and squeezes until I literally panic, is constantly making noises, taps, talks to himself, etc.

For example, tonight after a long day of him arguing with me non stop, jumping around the house with jingle bell socks, playing loudly with his baby sister (all good fun- I’m not upset about it), and at least 5 occasions of sneak bear hugs that almost triggered me to shove him off of me because I began to hyperventilate.... I desperately need a moment. I’m knitting quietly with no tv while the baby is asleep and he’s in the shower and dad is at work. He comes downstairs to play his game on the computer (he just likes being close by) and he’s narrating everything he’s doing, clicking, making noises, and the game itself has ongoing music. I’m about ready to just burst into tears because it’s too much. Which sounds SO silly unless you’ve been there too.

There are many times where I just need quiet time to work through being unbearably anxious. My husband is gone a lot so I can’t always just count on him to take over while I take a minute. I have attempted to explain to my son why it’s so important he respects me and the boundaries I set when I’m feeling anxious, but he just says he doesn’t understand and then thinks I’m being mean. (The pre-teen angst in this house is REAL and I want to die lol).

*editing to add that YES I’ve tried medication. I’m just looking on how I can get my son to understand what goes on in my head and body with anxiety.